Deaf Ears

That's one of my special powers, tuning people out. Went to visit a friend at his desk recently just because I wanted to take a break from work for a few minutes. Who am I kidding, I wanted to take a break from looking busy or something like that. But honestly, sometimes you need to get away from desk work, living the keyboardist's life is incredibly boring at times and taking a few minutes to chat with your friends and co-workers is really the best way to keep your mind from turning into the mush often found in the bottom of diapers belonging to babies and seniors alike.

So let's give him a name... Rigley. I don't know, I'm pretty drugged up to combat the migraine of the month which, is taking friggin' long to work considering I downed it several hours ago. I'm going to start looking into intravenously medicating myself soon... if only to get these things to work faster. Like the time I went to get my wisdom teeth extracted and passed out as they were giving me the relaxant, didn't even make it to the actual anesthesia. Oh heavens, that was awesome. Anyway, that name didn't come easy and to be frank really doesn't make a connection and I'll probably forget it once I finish typing but for this post we'll use that.

I sat down and started the conversation. Funny thing happened, and I swear it wasn't premeditated but as he talked I zoned out and my nodding and "uh-huh"ing went into auto-drive...a living, breathing bobblehead if you will. Oh come on, all you married people know exactly what I'm talking about. Engaging conversation is one thing but sometimes you just need to tune out the plebeian crap. I do it all the time, and not always on purpose. It turns on and off without prejudice especially if computer stuff comes up, I'm sure there's a ton of stuff I yammer on about to Mr. Stinky's deaf ears as well. Welcome to marriage.

But Rigley's not used to it and became offended when he realized that instead of participating in the conversation I was looking out the window. I have a thing for looking outside, I like just seeing what's going on... I also don't have a window. It's pretty pathetic. He called me back to the present and asked if I had been listening to him and without thinking of his feelings I confirmed that I had, in fact tuned him out coz he was boring me. Nice? No. Suppose I could've spared his feelings and lied, maybe something was happening outside that caught my attention but I decided long ago that tact is just beating around the bush when the more effective method of getting to the point is simply spraying the bush with buckshot and waiting for the injured to stagger out and finishing it off with a good slipper beating. I think my drugs might be kicking in judging from that last sentence.

Promptly following my explanation about unconsciously tuning people out, he resumed talking and my ears failed to work once again. It could've been the mood I was in which made me less conducive to paying attention or perhaps on that day he was just crazy boring. Since I don't like taking blame for most things we'll say it was him. The conversation ended shortly after that and I drifted back to my desk. Being bored there is better than being bored with someone else coz I don't have to pretend to my computer that I'm actually interested or paying attention. Hey, did I tell you that I am the bus driver on the express route to hell?

I wrote the above last night but needed to edit today simply because medication induces in me an odd state of incoherence and regresses my English skills to a grade 8 level. And also to report that I did the exact same thing to Amy this morning when she told me she was hungry, which resulted in her shaking her fist at me and leaving. Really, where's that Mother Theresa award I so greatly deserve?