Priorities

Today is the last day for a long time in which I've got to get up, shower, find underwear and socks, coiff up, co-ordinate my outfit, have breakfast, catch the train and go to work at a set time.

For the next year I will be on-call 24/7 but at least I don't have to shower. Or get dressed. Or eat. Or do anything on a set schedule. Am I kind of excited about that? I think so.

Also, I'll be able to eat whatever I want, whenever I want. Now that's exciting! I may have just peed a little bit but that may be from the baby squishing my bladder...

Collision Course Set!

Mr. Stinky and I went grocery shopping. We were in the produce section. While he was selecting several apples of choice for later consumption I pushed the cart. Very mundane, not at all interesting. Until the bumper cart rolled along.

A woman with a toddler in her cart decided to leave her little side street aisle to rejoin the main aisle, which was where I waited for Mr. Stinky. I had my cart pushed to the side so as not to block traffic. She wasn't paying absolute attention to her surroundings but didn't seem completely oblivious at the same time so let's just call her careless. As she swung her cart into the main aisle she took the corner way too sharply and smashed into the front corner of my cart. Hard enough to jettison my cart backwards and into my ever expanding belly.

I was a little bemused by this woman and it probably showed on my face. She flicked her eyes up at me with a harried expression and uttered a quick "sorry" to which I responded with a bland smile and "OK". To allow her safe passage I pulled my cart back a few inches so we wouldn't be wedged together any longer.

Instead of correcting the position of her cart she pushed her cart forward and therefore staying the course of her previous ramming path, abused my cart and belly some more. The carts were locked and screaming at each other and still she pushed. Remember I said I was in the main aisle, right? That means there was plenty of space in which to maneuver, but I suppose she decided the quickest way out of there was to scrape her cart all along the corner of mine violently before finally becoming free of entanglement. In terms of being in actual cars, my front corner would've been quite smashed up while her car would have been smashed and scraped up all down the side. And still she kept going.

After this incident Mr. Stinky returned with a bag of apples and made a comment about female Asian drivers and I laughed loudly. In the parking lot, we gave her plenty of time to load up and drive away before we dared tread on the same roadways. I still can't believe how poorly she handled her cart but has a driver's licence.

Slow Friday

I don't think this baby subscribes to the same newsletters that I do on fetal development. For the past couple of weeks I've been told that I should be feeling fewer movement than before because there's less room in my belly for baby to move around. Let me tell you how strongly baby disagrees as he seems incredibly determined to make more space in there. I am keenly aware of baby's every waking moment, especially in the middle of the night when I sometimes think of rolling on top of my belly to stop the in utero break dancing. If I thought that Bugbug was crazy active - which she totally is, this next one will run circles around her. I am worried.

Also had a run-in with a co-worker who annoys me muchly. I've probably written about her before but I don't remember if I ever gave her a name. When I see her approaching I will usually turn around and walk the other way regardless of how not subtle and super rude it looks. When she does manage to corner me to interrogate my personal life I will be polite but give very minimal answers so as to discourage friendship.

Today she followed me straight into the washroom and there was no way for me to escape. I took a deep breath and put on a smile.

Woman I Do Not Like: Oh! You're still here! (referencing my pregnant belly)

Stinky T: Yes I am. (No shit, Sherlock is what I really wanted to say. Unoriginal yes, but nobody asked you.)

WIDNL: But your baby is coming soon. How much longer?

Stinky T: Oh, end of the month.

WIDNL: One more month??

Stinky T: No, end of the month.

Pause

WIDNL: One more week?

At this point I just ignored her, finished up and left.

Hockey Fight

I was pretty excited for Jim Balsillie in the beginning when he put in a bid to buy the Phoenix Coyotes with plans to move them to Hamilton, Ontario coz wow, a Canadian bringing the Canadian game back to Canada! But as the hockey opera drags on and he's resorted to mudslinging and petulance I'm wondering what exactly he's trying to achieve.

I may not be an international business magnate so perhaps he knows better but it seems to make sense to me that when trying to enter an extremely exclusive boys' club run by a teeny tiny little bobble headed person that you try to get as many allies as you can instead of smearing their names in the mud. I don't think that's part of any initiation process so at this point it seems to me that even Mr. Balsillie knows that he's not going to be allowed to buy the team. For payback, he's going to take down the league?

I don't know if what he's doing will ultimately clear up and improve the league or not. Right now he's looking pretty immature, at least from what the media reports. Call me a lightweight but I don't think I can support him and his cause any longer.

Status Quo

It's puzzling to me when a person I haven't seen in awhile but knew I was pregnant exclaims with surprise, "Hi Stinky T, wow, you've gotten big!" Was I supposed to stay the same size until we met up again? Surely they knew that I'm supposed to get all big and unwieldy as the months crawl by..

I realize a lot of times it's due to people feeling the need to say something for the sake of being friendly, starting up a conversation, something.. it's probably along the same lines as "How 'bout them Leafs?" and "Can you believe the weather lately?" but yah. It's boring.

I think I may have heaved and rolled off the wrong side of the bed this morning if comments like that bug me. I want to be comforted by heaping mounds of junk food, none of which I'm allowed to have. That makes me even more grumpy. This post got angrier the more I typed. I'm just going to pout.

Bug-bug Says Melo-melon

I've been eating on average one watermelon per week for the past month or so. We're talking about those 15lb suckers, mind you so that's a lot of watermelon. At first Mr. Stinky expressed dismay over how much space the cut up fruit was taking up in the fridge and thought that most of it would probably be dumped when I'd either gotten sick of watermelon or just couldn't finish it all before it went bad. He doesn't complain anymore.

Being pregnant with Bug-bug I ate a lot of fruit too, I'd sit down and polish off a platter from Costco within a few days but there wasn't a constant need for fruit. And there wasn't a particular thing that I had to had to eat.

This time, yes boys and girls, the Stinky one has been sperminated again, I feel a void if I haven't stuffed my face with watermelon every single day. On the plus side it's mostly water but packed with good nutrients so I'm not putting on unnecessary weight because all my other binging foods already fill that requirement nicely. Another pleasant side effect is that it actually makes me feel better when my stomach is unsettled. Who knew watermelon was the new anti nauseant/antacid?

I'm due early October. Here's hoping I don't deliver a watermelon.

Chop Chop!

OK, I sort of fibbed. The month of May came to a close and I didn't do it. Only because I neglected to look at the calendar when I first told you I'd cut my hair and see that it was already end of the month. But anyway, I did it. Last Friday I took the plunge and had a big rat tail's length of hair chopped off. Well, longer than a regular rat at least. I keep wanting to make some metaphor about foot-long hotdogs for some strange reason, but it just doesn't work that way so I'll have to show you the results.

My hair is now, on average about 16 inches shorter. It's really kind of crazy considering how different it looks and feels. I was really very apprehensive about it because I'm a wash and go kind of person, how would I manage short hair that might need styling products, blow dryers, nifty techniques and such? As it turns out, my stylist did such an amazing job I don't have to do much at all. It sits as nicely as it did the day she did me (hee!) and I only have to rub in a dab of mousse to keep the a few stray strands of bangs out of my eyes.

So without further ado, my before and after plus the casualty that will be sent to some wig making charity. In the after picture, one side of my head looks a little flat. That's because after I left the salon I couldn't stop touching and fussing with my crazy new 'do and thus wrecked the symmetry of the stylist's magical creation. Rest assured that I have since stopped touching myself (double hee!) and everything is once again very much unflat-looking.