Skids and Dives

Sounds like some backyard water sport. It's really not. This past weekend Mr. Stinky and I took a trip around Lake Ontario. We took the Seaway Trail around the southern end of the lake and up around to Kingston or thereabouts before heading south back home. Along the way we stopped at several cities and towns, nothing to write home about and camped at several state parks. I must say though, Kring Point State Park was a really cool stay as most of all its campsites were on the St. Lawrence River waterfront and we watched several barges chug through. We picked a fairly private site and enjoyed a fire-cooked dinner of salmon and potatoes right on the lake.

Last night, back on terra firma Canada we stayed at Presqu'ile Park south of Brighton. I guess it was a nice park, but nothing outstanding. We needed dinner, I didn't feel like cooking and cleaning afterwards so we headed into town. Nothing to be found in Brighton so off we headed to Trenton where one of the first places to eat was called "Rednecks Pub" with the requisite swarm of hogs sitting in the parking lot. Seedy looking, like a dive. We didn't eat there but it brought up fond memories of another time not long ago...

Mr. Stinky entered a marathon in Massey, a small town between Sudbury and Sault Ste. Marie. He placed a hold on a room at a local motel in town for the weekend and we were told what signs to look for as it was "kind of hidden". The day of, we arrived at Massey and set about looking for this motel. When we landmarked all the signs the motel guy told us to look for, we slowed down and whaddya know, there it was if a little run down. We pulled into the drive and the spidey senses just exploded.

Stinky T: 'Girls Girls Girls'?

Mr. Stinky: There's the motel.

Stinky T: But it says 'Girls Girls Girls'!

Mr. Stinky: Oh shit, are you serious?.... It's all one building!

Stinky T: That's disgusting, I don't want to stay here! We're not staying here!

Mr. Stinky: But all the other places are booked for the race and this guy's got my name and cell phone number down...

Stinky T: I don't care, we're not staying here. If the strip joint is attached to the motel can you imagine how much DNA is all over that place?!? Nasty!

Mr. Stinky: Heh, I guess we wouldn't be getting much sleep with the music and all and I need a good night's sleep for tomorrow...

Stinky T: Eek! There's a man in the office window, see him? He's on the phone and he's looking down at us. Let's go! Let's go let's go let's go let's go!!

Mr. Stinky: Shit, he's watching us! What if he knows it's me? What should we do?

Stinky T: Reverse! Let's go! Let's get out here, I don't care if he's watching us. Let's go let's go let's go let's go!!

That, my friends was a total dive run by a skid. A skid in his stained undershirt smoking and talking on the phone, staring at people coming up the drive like a hungry guard dog waiting to pounce. I shudder to think of what his motel rooms are like and the kinds of stains, diseases and memories left behind from the side jobs performed after the lap dances. Luckily, we found another roadside motel a little farther away for accomodations. It was almost a dive too, but the landlady was nice and the place was clean. After the first motel, I could hardly complain.

P.S. Remember how I said I had some crazy neighbours who love cranking the a/c? It's say what, mid-teens now outside and their unit is just the little engine that could, outcooling the Arctic. Nuts I tell ya.